Love was in the air?

I had such a wonderful Valentine’s Day. I was showered with love and treated to an amazing romantic dinner at my favorite fine dining restaurant.  I was lavished with flowers, candy and diamonds.  Love for me was profoundly professed.

NOT…

I am Single and that was just a dream lol.  My day consisted of not remembering it was even Valentine’s Day. Subliminal avoidance maybe?  Headed to work and tried to get and stay focused on the year end tasks.

After work I went to see a man about some teeth. Ha Ha get it – like going to see a man about a dog, I don’t know my Gram used to say that all the time when she would ask where I was going.  It was a man – a Dental Lab Technician who is helping to orchestrate a very costly and long overdue restoration of my mouth.  If you didn’t know me you may think I am a Meth addict or never brushed my teeth once in my life – neither of which is true.

On the way from there I had to stop at CVS for last minute V-Day gifts for family – none of whom even said hey thank you.  But I did get Roses and a card from Dad, my aunt gave me Godiva Chocolates and a Cat Post It Dispenser with a scratch off I won $5 on.  My Gram is bed ridden and no one (including me, so not can’t bitch too much) thought to ask if she wanted us to go get her stuff to give.  My uncle got me more Godiva Chocolates and a Stuffed Lion ( I am a Leo).

From there King Kullen to get a can of biscuits and then home to serve dinner.  Beef Stew from the Crock Pot.  Prepped veggies and meat the night before at midnight while having a cup of coffee and then was able to toss it all in and set it and forget it until I got home.  It was pretty good – I will make some tweeks to my recipe for next time though.

After dinner I went to my favorite dollar store which now a days $1 stores have way more than just $0.99 stuff.  Of course when I have $ the 50 things I pass all the time and say I am gonna buy one day when I have a little extra, were all gone.

Back home to do a little more cleaning and organizing in the kitchen and then headed up to my floor to do my own dishes, feed Bubba and shower.

I had some plans to write this last night but my niece bugged me to watch Criminal Minds with her and I can’t write with her in the room.  She watches the show but doesn’t pay attention then asks 100 questions about what happened. So annoying.

I was so emotional out of nowhere though last night.  All of a sudden I busted out in tears over something silly, but obviously something in my sub concisous was nawing at me – but what I don’t know exactly. Loneliness on Valentine’s Day, Anxiety about this dental procedure, overall stress and worry- or a combo?

About this teeth thing – I have 20 teeth in my mouth.  Adults should have 32. 6 have to be pulled and three are Crowns.  So technically 11 real 3 fake. Ugh. This has been an ongoing issue all of my life – bad genetics combined with pounds of candy as a child and parents to distracted to properly teach and stay on top of my mouth hygiene.  And then once I got my first job at 13 my Dad had me start paying for my own dental work so a $300 filling took me three months to pay off and that is how it went for the next 20 years on and off with a dentist start work go each week make payments then stop for a while to give my mouth and wallet a break and then there was new stuff to go bad.  Never ever ends and I kind of gave up after the last guy basically stole $350.00 of mine. I was making pre-payments for a Crown.  Then when I go to get it done finally he told me that I used the $350 for temporaries and an argument ensued,  he made the temporary wrong the first time and it fell out after 48 hours, went back had it redone and it was still uneven causing it to fall out a week later and then finally on the third try it kept.  So four months later when I went back and he told me that I was SOL because I never got a receipt and he never said that he was charging me for temporaries or I would have addressed it at that time.  So at that point I had to start saving again and when I finally went back the tooth was cracked and had to be pulled.  This was the second dentist in four years that gave me prices and a schedule and then found some way to legally back out of out agreement.  It is so frustrating.

So my Dad came into some money and a client of his offered me a wholesale restoration deal – $45k of work for $22k.  My mouth will be healthy and complete when this process ends in 6 months or so and then maybe I can start life over. 10 Impants and 18 Crowns later. I have been so self concscious that it has kept me from reconnecting with old friends, trying to make new ones, get out and date and I have hardly smiled in a picture in years.  Even laughing in public I have to control so my mouth doesn’t open more than a little. I would be mortified if anyone got a glimpse into this disgusting mouth.

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I know most people reading aren’t dentists but you can get a general idea of how terrible my mouth is and how empty it looks 😦

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Plowing a new path. Ryan Lochte.

Hey Y’All (lol)

Not to brag (ok it will not seem like anything worth bragging about) but I started the gym yesterday. And I want to go and it feels good to hurt so bad lol.  Two days  of cardio, tomorrow I will do some machines for upper body.  Hopefully I don’t look like a jerk since it has been a long time since I have used machines in a gym. Figuring out the adjustments on some of the bikes is hard enough. I’m exaggerating but still took me like 2 minutes too long.  Trying to go the whole week get a great kickoff then rest Saturday and Sunday then the following week still mostly cardio but adding exercises and just generally trying to get in a groove. And I shopped before hand and marinated some butterflied chicken breasts in organic sesame ginger stuff.  Got home and cooked them in the oven, sauteed a fancy zuchinni and tomatoe with some butter and garlic and oil ( I know baby steps) and had five halves of simply boiled baby red potatoes.  It was pretty good.  The marinade was overpowering the chicken but I think that was because they were so thin and just lapped it up.  Last night I had a meal delivered from Munchery.  North Carolina Pulled Pork.  That story will be part of a different post – coming soon.

I went out of my comfort zone and watched a (gasp) MOVIE!  I really am not a movie person for some reason. I am a TV junkie, primetime {on dvr never live}  and animal, wildlife, nature, law enforcement shows to name a few.  I have watched movies and love some movies but rarely do I watch one through.  Occasionally I will watch bits of an old movie if I pass it while channel surfing because the dvr is empty.  But I had a 99 cent rental from Amazon for Precious which was on my watchlist.  I am glad I did. I watched half last night and the rest just now. This movie is right up my alley.  Great story and superb acting and producing in my opinion.  Real life story on the big screen. Hits a little close to home because the mother generally speaking shows behavior reminiscent of someone close, figuratively close not near and dear close.  And NO it is not my mother. But that is a topic deserving of a full post – or maybe 7! I could easily talk that much about the sad situation.

OK can I vent about something.   I really hate that RYAN LOCHTE is on DWTS and being treated so nice after the stunt he pulled in Rio.  Its like it didn’t even happen.  Yea he lost some deals and endorsement but I am sure it will not be long before he gets more because of any negaitve publicity. He disgraced the US by blaming locals of robbing him and made a spectacle of it.  Bullshit! He should have lost his medal.  It really makes me mad.  So yea I put him in my title.  I think I will use his name to maybe hopefully get myself some publicity.

I have also been trying to stay active with other things like cleaning up this disaster of a room little by little. Keeping on top of dishes and laundry.  Started organizing some drawers.  I have a nice size bin of stuff for the homeless or those otherwise less fortunate.   I keep it in my trunk in case I run into anyone in need of something when I am out and about. I had my car cleaned and detailed two weeks ago and am trying hard to keep it clean inside.  I had an oil change but I need some other things looked at so I need to start putting away for that for a few weeks.  My next step is to make one night to post at least 30 items on OfferUp & Close5 and ebay for Sale.  I have 30 dvd’s if I can sell them $3 each that is $90 and a heck of a start.

My normal routine was go to work, go home cook eat clean up, feed furbabies, take shower (usually ten other random things in between) and then “get settled” watching tv doing my writing, survey taking, product reviewing, reward collecting or whatever else comes up.  Now I work, stop home to work out dinner situation, change and head to the gym. Come home eat alone talkin to Gran and switch any laundry if appilicable and then feed my cat and take a nice shower.  And I am using my good face soap and trying to slowly learn to take care of myself and pamper myself a little more. And wanting to do it and feeling good doing it.

So this is me plowing a new path however slowly it may be. I am just trying to keep on keeping on.

As always thanks for making it this far and if you have it will be Wednesday morning or day sometime.  I am trying something different.  I post so late I feel like no one that follows me sees me in Reader by the next day. My last post got nothing zilch zippo lol.  So I am setting this to publish around the same time I get up for work.  8ish. I can’t say when I wake up because that is like 5-6.

Comments welcome and btw that gave me an idea – Comment/Conversation Policy coming soon.

See Ya,

Sab